Career & Life Coaching

Business leadership is not about any single quality so much as it is about a number of qualities that come together to create something much stronger than any of those qualities alone. Business leadership is not so much about managing others and “taking charge” as it is about motivating by example.

So if business leadership is something that is difficult to pin down, what steps can you take so that you will find yourself recognized as a leader in this, the 21st century? What can you do to incorporate the principles of leadership into your life so that you will be able to achieve your goals and rise to the top in your organization or your career field?

One step is to look at those leaders who you admire. Whether you’re inspiration comes from political leaders – those who have been able to unite the people of their country during difficult times – or from leaders within your own field, when you are looking for information that will help you to take on a business leadership role, it’s important to understand what makes someone a leader.

In other words, when you are thinking about business leadership, it’s important to take the time to understand courage, determination, and to learn more about the ways in which leaders speak to those who follow them. Ultimately, what you will find is that by embracing those qualities within yourself, you will be able to persevere and to reach the goals that you have set for yourself and for those who you are working with.

Ultimately, what you are likely to discover is that, in order to differentiate yourself in the 21st century and to take on a business leadership role, you will need to:

• Learn to set aside excuses. The majority of people who are in business find a way to come up with a number of excuses when something that they have been asked to do isn’t done. Leaders, on the other hand, focus on getting the job done.

• Learn the value of making mistakes. When we make mistakes, it’s important to take advantage of the lessons that come out of them so that we can use that knowledge to move forward.

• Learn to lead from within. When you are looking at business leadership characteristics, you’ll see that those who are in a supervisory role are not just watching others and telling them what they do wrong; instead, when they see a problem they jump into the trenches and work with their staff, helping them to solve problems and to find creative solutions.

Business leadership is about working with others and motivating them to do more – to be more. When you’re looking for a way to differentiate yourself from others, one of the best things that you can do is to work well with others, put forth your best effort at all times and to make sure that – at all times – you’re making an effort to bring a team of people together.

Finally, remember this: business leadership is about having a willingness to try something new. To set yourself apart from the crowd, you need to look at the big picture – and then to get everyone else to see it too.

I was recently speaking with a client interested in improving her negotiation skills for her upcoming salary review. She has been in her new position for just over four months. She has exceeded expectations, and feeling confident in her job. However, she is unhappy with her salary. Afraid to negotiate and risk losing the job offer, and grateful for the paycheck, she accepted the job offer without negotiating her salary or compensation package.

Salary negotiation is the most sensitive part of a job interview. We emotionalize it because we are uncomfortable talking about money. You needn’t be afraid or feel at the mercy of your employer. They expect you to negotiate. In fact, in virtually all instances an interviewer has the power to negotiate a higher salary. However, you must prepare for your job interview including salary negotiation in the same manner you prepare your resume, cover letter, etc.

Starting a new job or position is the best time to get the salary or compensation package you want. After you are hired it becomes a bit more difficult to make up your salary.

Salary Negotiations Research Results

Research Question#1: Do you expect candidates to negotiate regarding their salary, benefits, and work schedules once you’ve made an offer?

Results:

82% reported that they did expect a candidate to negotiate.

18% reported they did not expect a candidate to negotiate.

Research Question #2: On average, how much of a range do you have to negotiate a higher salary with a professional candidate (not hourly personnel)?

Results:

64% reported they can negotiate up to 10% higher salary.

20% reported they can negotiate up to 20% higher salary.

18% reported they have no limit on salary negotiations.

0% reported they have no authorization to negotiate higher salary.

Salary negotiation is about what you think you are worth. Therefore, before entering into a salary negotiation you need to know the following:

• Know the market; research salaries
• Understand your value – what are you worth based on your skills and experiences?
• Be clear on the skills and qualifications required for the position
• Don’t overlook the overall compensation package
• Know what you want

How do you go about negotiating your salary?

You should never bring up salary during the interview. Always let the employer bring it up. If a salary amount is offered take your time to consider it before accepting – 1-2 days is acceptable before approaching the negotiation process.

If you are asked your salary expectations, give a range based on your research or tell the employer you are open based on the position and the overall compensation package. Again the negotiation starts after the employer has made the offer.

During the negotiation process, you should consider the entire remuneration package, not just salary, including job related benefits, and working conditions like time off, location and other factors. If it’s a job you want but the package is not ideal, be ready to try to influence the employer to improve the offer by pointing out your skill sets and ways in which you can add value to the company. If all else fails, be prepared to say ‘No’ if your bottom line needs are not being met.

Some people, when they are looking for a new job turn to the sources that they’ve come to think of as reliable. They look at the Help Wanted section of the newspaper, browse through online job search sites that are, in effect, a larger scale Help Wanted section. Others take a different approach. Instead of looking to the traditional ways that people conduct a job search, they turn to the hidden market and look for a job that will fit their personality, a job in which they will be able to make a difference.

What is the hidden market?

Imagine that there were a store where the items you needed were always in stock and there were rarely, if ever, long lines. Now consider the way that the same analogy applies to your job search and you’ll start to develop a sense of what the hidden market is. The hidden market is where many of the jobs that are going to be ideal for you are. The hidden market is also a place where you will have very little competition with others who are going after the same jobs you are; the challenge is that no one can give you directions to the hidden market.

If the hidden market isn’t somewhere that I can just go during my job search but that’s where the great jobs are, what does it mean?

Just because no one can give you clear directions to the hidden market does not mean that it doesn’t exist; the trick to conducting a job search in the hidden market is taking the time to get to know yourself. Look at your interests. Identify your talents. Take a look at both your strengths and your weaknesses. Once you’ve done so, you’ll be able to have a sense of what sort of environment you will thrive in – and then your job search can really begin.

What are the advantages of looking for the hidden market?

When you take the time to look inward before actively pursuing your job search, you’ll know what sort of company you want to work for and what type of position you are going to want to hold. Unlike a traditional job search, however, the key to a successful job search on the hidden market will lead you to research the companies where you would like to work, to make phone calls to those who may or may not be doing the hiring and to take a chance on sending your resume even if they are not advertising open positions.

When you take the time to look to the hidden market during your job search, what you are really doing is making a commitment to your personal satisfaction and growth. Rather than simply looking to see what might be out there, you’re taking control and taking the initiative to bring about your own success.

With the right drive and determination, your job search will become something bigger; you won’t just find a job. Instead, when you access the hidden market, you’ll find a path to a rich and fulfilling career.

Values are ideals that guide or qualify your personal conduct, interaction with others, and involvement in your career. They help you to distinguish what is right from wrong.

It stands to reason then, that teaching values to your children is an important part of being a parent. Values make our society safe and workable, and instilling them in our kids is the most significant and effective thing we can do for their happiness. Studies show that morality and value-oriented behaviour helps a child develop a sense of autonomy, independence, and confidence.

Values can be classified into four categories:

* Personal
* Cultural
* Social
* Work

Personal Values are principles that define you as an individual, and determine how you will face the world and relate with people. Personal Values include honesty, reliability and trust.

Cultural Values help you feel connected to a larger community of people with similar backgrounds. Cultural values include the practice of your faith and customs. They are the principles that maintain your connection with your cultural roots.

Social Values are principles that indicate how you relate meaningfully to others in social situations, including those involving family, friends and co-workers.

Work Values are principles that guide your behaviour, projects and contexts. They define how you work and how you relate to your co-workers, bosses, and clients. They also reveal your potential for advancement.

The four categories consist of 12 Universal Values:

* Honesty
* Courage
* Peaceability
* Self-reliance and Potential
* Self-Discipline and Moderation
* Fidelity and Chastity
* Loyalty and Fidelity
* Respect
* Love
* Unselfishness and Sensitivity
* Kindness and Friendliness
* Justice and Mercy

1. Honesty – with other individuals, with institutions, with society, and with oneself.
2. Courage – daring to attempt difficult things. The strength not to follow the crowd, and to say no and mean it.
3. Peaceability – understanding that differences are seldom resolved through conflict, and meanness in others is an indication of their problem or insecurity. Controlling your temper.
4. Self-Reliance and Potential – awareness and development of your gifts and uniqueness. Taking responsibility for your own actions. Overcoming the tendency to blame other for difficulties. Commitment to personal excellence.
5. Self-Discipline and Moderation – physical, mental, & financial self-discipline. Moderation in speaking & in eating. Understanding the limits of body and mind. The ability to balance self-discipline with spontaneity.
6. Fidelity and Chastity – teach your kids the value and security of fidelity. Give them a grasp of the long-range and widespread consequences that can result from sexual immorality and infidelity. This is an instruction, rather than a definition.
7. Loyalty and Dependability – loyalty to family and other organizations and institutions to which commitments are made. Reliability and consistency in doing what you say you will do.
8. Respect – for life, property, parents, elders, nature. Respect for the beliefs and rights of others. Self-respect and the avoidance of self-criticism.
9. Love – for friends, neighbors, family, even adversaries. Individual and personal caring that goes beyond loyalty and respect.
10. Unselfishness and Sensitivity – becoming more extra-centered and less self-centered. Sensitivity to the needs of others and of situations. Empathy, tolerance, brotherhood.
11. Kindness and Friendliness – awareness that being kind and considerate is more admirable than being tough or strong. The tendency to understand rather than confront. The ability to make and keep friends. Helpfulness. Cheerfulness.
12. Justice and Mercy – An understanding of natural consequences. Obedience to the law, fairness in work and play.

Values should be taught to children of all ages with differing agendas and changing emphasis as they mature. Values are best taught in the home, since parents are the best exemplars and instructors. Parents should consciously develop their own set of family values, and consciously teach these to their children – leading by example and also taking the time to explain.

Children may develop values different from those you tried to teach them. However, they will do so with a solid foundation, and with a basis of comparison.

Most people want to be successful in life. But success can mean different things to different people: making more money; spending quality time with your family; or learning to play a musical instrument. Since success is personal, defining what it means for you is the first step to achieving it. Once you are clear about what success looks like for you, here are some important points to help you achieve it.

Steps to Success

1. Know your Potential: In order to succeed at anything you need to see that you have the potential to reach your goals
2. Understand your Goal: List three or four reasons why you want to achieve this goal? What is the result you want to obtain?
3. Set Realistic Goals & Timelines: Often times we want overnight success. Make sure your goals and the time frame you have set are realistic.
4. Create a Plan: This is by far the most important document of all. It allows you to keep track of everything involving your goal.
5. No Shortcuts: Shortcuts are sloppy and compromise your work and your integrity. “Anything worth doing is worth doing well.”
6. Have Courage: Depending on what success means to you, you will have to have courage to stand up for what you believe and desire to do, even if it means disappointing others.
7. Stay Motivated: It is critical to stay motivated when striving for the big goal of success. Motivational tools will help you stay on track.
8. Be Passionate: Have passion for what you are doing and working toward. You will automatically put more effort into it.
9. No Excuses: If you want something badly enough, there is always a way!
10. No Fear: Fear of Failure is a normal emotion for everyone. How you get past the fear determines whether you experience success.
11. Create Opportunities: Make things happen rather than waiting for opportunities to find you.
12. Attitude: A good attitude will allow you to turn any bad situation into a learning experience. Staying positive and surrounding yourself with friends that share a positive attitude will help you succeed.
13. Make the Best of Each Day: Make the most of every day and accomplish something – even if it’s something small. Every baby step counts towards your success.
14. Set Daily Goals: Setting daily goals keeps you on track. Seeing your progress will help keep you going.
15. Accept Responsibility: You will have help in many instances; however, the bottom line is that you are responsible for the choices you will make.
16. Be Open to Improvement: Accept that you do not have all the answers and more importantly, be open to recommendations from other people.
17. Paint a Picture: A great way to keep working toward your goal is to picture what it will look like when you are successful.
18. Identify Procrastinations: If you have a problem with procrastination, make a list of distractions you routinely choose, so you can recognize when you are off course and get back on track.
19. Want versus Need: Do it because you want it, not because you need it. When you want something, it requires and creates intention, desire, and action – all powerful tools for being successful (doing something out of need usually leads to pain, stress, and frustration).
20. Believe in yourself: Your confidence is what will get you through the challenges.
21. Be Efficient: Use your time and effort wisely.
22. Have Balance in your Life: Make the time for both hard work and pleasure.
23. Have Fun: Fun is a crucial element of success, but one that often forgotten once we get into the process. Find fun and joy in what you are doing, even in the midst of the challenges.

Is your life simply happening without deep design on your part? I invite you to take the Self Awareness Quiz below. Explore and live the questions.

1. Are you getting what you want out of life?
2. When was the last time you had some fun?
3. What gives you the greatest sense of joy, aliveness, motivation or excitement?
4. How are you growing personally and professionally?
5. What are you tolerating?
6. Has your profession or business become your life?
7. If you felt free, had no fear and no guilt, what work would you love to create or do?
8. Where do you get your energy? Is it healthy?
9. As a child, what did you most often dream of doing or being when you grew up? What happened to these dreams and ideas?
10. What area in your life would you like to see change?

I look forward to hearing what transpires for you! If you would like to share this experience, please e-mail me at cecile@cosmiccoachingcentre.com or call 416-782-5001.

I recently spent some time revising my personal vision/mission statement for my career coaching and mentoring practice. While doing this, it occurred to me that the vision I have for my work is closely related to my personal vision. Having a job that reflects my personal vision is powerful because it has allowed me to create a business life for myself that truly reflects who I am. Companies know all about vision and mission statements and getting their employees on board. Vision and mission statements propel the company in the direction that they want, and ultimately towards success. Many of us have spent countless hours working on these statements for our employers, and doing our part to contribute to their vision as apart of the team. Much like a business, we, as human beings have a purpose or mission in life. What if we spent as much time getting to know who we are and what we want for ourselves? A personal vision/mission statement is the framework for creating a powerful life. Unlike a goal, a vision or mission rarely changes. It is a reason for our existence. It guides us in the decisions we make and the directions we take.

Your Personal Vision
Close your eyes and picture yourself in the future. It may be a few months or years from today. See the person you are; what you are doing, who you are with, what you have accomplished, what is important to you, and how people relate to you. How does it feel to be you? Feel the person you are, your true self. Now, open your eyes and see your life and yourself in the present, through those eyes. You will begin to notice the changes you need to make to honour this vision and lead a powerful life. A Personal Vision is a picture of your True Self in the future. An effective personal vision includes all the important elements of your life and career; it is who you want to be, what you want to do, how you want to feel, what you want to own, and who you want to associate with. Although your personal vision helps you to see into the future, it must be grounded in the present. It is a statement of who you are, and who you are becoming. It is the framework for the process of creating your life. Your vision is where you are headed, how you get there is your mission statement.

Your Personal Mission Statement
A Personal Mission Statement is how you will manifest your Personal Vision in your daily life. It may be a few words or several pages, but it is not a “to do” list. It reflects your uniqueness and must speak to you powerfully about the person you are and the person you are becoming. Remember, it’s okay to be where you are, while heading somewhere else. In fact, the only place you can start, is where you are right now. Having a personal vision does not mean your life changes overnight. But it will change. Your personal mission statement provides the steps to get you there. Your Personal Mission Statement should answer three questions: 1. What is my life about (Purpose)? 2. What do I stand for (Values)? 3. What actions do I take to manifest my Purpose and my Values? Stephen Covey, author or The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People writes that an empowering Mission Statement represents the deepest and best within you. It comes out of a solid connection with your deep inner life. Is the fulfillment of your own unique gifts. It’s the expression of your unique capacity to contribute. Addresses and integrates the four fundamental human needs and capacities in the physical, social/emotional, mental and spiritual dimensions. Deals with all the significant roles in your life. It represents a lifetime balance of personal, family, work, community – whatever roles you feel are yours to fill. Is written to inspire you – not to impress anyone else. It communicates to you and inspires you on the most essential level.

Covey also tells us that “creating a Personal Mission Statement will be, without question, one of the most powerful and significant things you will ever do to take leadership of you life. In it you will identify the most important roles, relationships, and things in your life – who you want to be, what you want to do, to whom and what you want of give your life, the principles you want to anchor your life to, the legacy you want to leave. All the goals and decisions you will make in the future will be based upon it. It’s like deciding first which wall you want to lean your ladder of life against, and then beginning to climb. It will be a compass – a strong source of guidance amid the stormy seas and pressing, pulling currents of you life.”

A Personal Vision/Mission can help propel you into a career change, finding a new job, or make your present job work better for you. The more connected your Personal Vision/Mission is to yourself, the better it can guide your career and your life.

Copyright 2009, Cecile Peterkin. All rights reserved.

Get honest and focused about what you really want. This will bring clarity to where it is best to put your time, energy, and resources. You must also face the fact that the biggest obstacle on your way to achieving success is you. Brian Tracy said,”The potential of the average person is like a huge ocean un-sailed, a new continent unexplored, a world of possibilities waiting to be released and channeled toward some great good.” His words are part of my belief system and the foundation of my coaching practice. This is why I enjoy seeing my clients having fun discovering things about themselves, doing things they love and fear, creating value for themselves and gaining control of their own life.

Think back: what have been your three most fulfilling accomplishments in life thus far, that you did not think were possible? Think of the mental barriers, no matter how small, that you had to overcome to achieve these three things.

Success in life depends on you. You are in control of the outcome. Whatever path you take in your life is of your own choosing. Whether it seem like it or not, even letting someone else take control of your life requires your consent on some level. You are the source of your own failure or success. You do not need anyone’s permission to change your life. The power to do so is within you. Remember: your skills, talents, knowledge, experience and attitude are the most valuable assets you have. Use them!

Getting good support makes it easier to make better choices. If you need support, a Personal Coach can help.

Find out more….

Goal setting is essential for building a successful life. However, teaching kids how to set and achieve goals is not part of most school curriculums, nor is it taught in most homes. Many parents never learned the techniques of goal setting, and are still struggling with their own. You don’t need to know it all. While you develop your own goal-setting skills, you can also be helping and encouraging your children to develop theirs. Goal setting is a life-long skill. It helps your child to focus their unique gifts and talents, it helps to cultivate and strengthening your child’s self-worth, and equips them to lead a life full of meaning purpose, and direction, regardless of the professional or personal paths they choose.

Things to consider when setting goals with your kids CAREER – school grades, skill development, future plan (ambition); PERSONAL- character development, and personal growth (self-image, sense of responsibility, ability, sefl-esteem), appearance; HEALTH – exercise, diet, over-all well-being, balance; COMMUNITY – commitment to serving others (volunteer work); FINANCIAL – understanding the value of money, earning, saving; FRIENDS – expanding their circle of friends, choosing friends wisely; HOUSEHOLD – chores, contribution to building home life; RECREATION – hobbies, relaxation, fun activities (movies, parties, etc.) ,

Things to remember Expect resistance; Be firm; Look for performance, not perfection; Kids need to see the end before they begin (incentive – what will happen if…); Kids need rewards; Kids need praise.

Results As kids learn how to set goals and experience the difference goal setting makes in their personal destinies, it will encourage them to take action. They will begin to create lives for themselves that they want and “Dare to live their Dreams!” As your kids become more aware of greater possibilities in their lives, and tap into their respective talents they will develop a stronger sense of self and of their contribution to society.

Goal setting doesn’t have to be an arduous task. In fact, setting goals can, and should, be fun. You can experience feelings of fulfillment, and success, but I requires commitment on your part – acknowledging your fears ( the worst case scenario), taking risks, allowing for challenges and detours, and most of all, giving yourself time.

In the words of Gladys Tabor; “We need time to dream, time to remember, and time to reach the infinite. Time to be.”

Your goals should be “SMART”

“S” - Specific
“M”- Measurable
“A” – Attainable
“R” – Realistic
“T” - Timely

Goal setting is most effective if you lay out a pathway for achieving your goals. This allows you to determine the steps you need to take to be successful, and see your progress.

Goal Setting Process

Start your goal setting process by creating a list of your dreams (things you would like to do). These dreams will become your goals. How do you do this?

From your list of dreams pick the ten most exciting things (these are now your goals) and add dates that you would like to do them by. For each dream (goal) go back and set intermediate or half-way goals. List short-term goals that will contribute to your accomplishment of the intermediate goals.

There is no limit to the number of goals that you set, just make sure they are realistic and attainable, and that you are committed to them.

Things to Consider: What are the ten places you must visit before you die?

What ten events would you really love to experience firsthand? (events that would be so awesome that you would talk about them for the rest of your life)

What ten skills would you most like to acquire (personal and/or professional)?

What five things would give you the greatest sense of accomplishments in your business life?

What ten things would give you the greatest sense of accomplishment in your personal life?

What would you like your family to experience over the next five years? (private school, trips, etc.)

What type of physical shape would you like to be in?

How much money would you like to earn per year? (what amount would provide your family with everything you need, plus enough left over for savings).

What does your dream home look like? (location, no. of bedrooms, bathrooms, decor, etc.)

After putting dates to your ten most exciting goals and setting intermediate goals, your short term goals are now the goals you want to achieve this year.

Short term Goals

List 10 of the Biggest Opportunities/Goals for 2003 that you can commit to.

This includes all areas of your life, family, financial, career, business, social, your body, learning, personal development, environments, recreation, adventures.

A Successful Environment
In order to achieve your goals, you must set yourself up for success. To do this, you want to make your life as friction free as possible. This means taking an honest look at the things or elements in your life that you may need to let go of, or restructure, that will simplify your life and allow for the success and fulfillment you so deserve.

Consider the following questions and see if/where you need to make some changes in order to achieve your goals.

Social/Emotional
Who are you going to spend time with who will encourage you, provide strength when you need it and who will help you evolve?

Physical Environment/ Activities
What will you use (physical and virtual) to keep you focused and on track? Look at your Daily Habits; Where do you need to make adjustments (additions, deletions), and what is working for you?

Something to remember:
A goal is a landmark to use as you move forward in life. It is a way of measuring progress and evaluating the effectiveness of your actions. Not reaching your goal by a target date is an opportunity to re-evaluate your strategies, commitments and the goals themselves. If you discover that you are not committed to a goal (which is OK), it may be that it is not something you really want. If this is the case, recognizing it allows you to put your energy into something you do want, and that you can be committed to.